Will gone crazy soon...

Really hate myself sometimes. Always being not patience and hot-tempered. Just want to chat with dear but end up fight with him. Didn't see him for a week already. I know I should appreciate the time with him even just on the phone, yet just can't stop myself from angry with him. After a moment, when I think back, myself will wondering too why am I angry with him. Not his problem of course. What happen to me? Having multiple personality? Will gone crazy soon. Or  maybe I am already crazy...

Headache...

Dear goes to outstation again. Goes to Johor this time. This trip will take another week. Just back from Ipoh for 4 days, and he got to go for another trip. Heartache seeing dear so tired. Really rather dear can get the job at Perlis. Chances to see him may be lower if he work at Perlis, but at least I know he can sleep well and eat enough when stay at house. Got his mother to take care of him is better than he got to travel here and there. Then, he also no need also think of save money and doesn't want eat. But now even see dear once a week also miss dear so much. What will happen if can only see dear once a month? Hmmm. Headache...

How long can I stand?

Travel to work everyday and miss dear make me feel really tiring. This may last for few years before I can get away from this problem. Even just few days, few months, it is enough to take away my life. What should I do? I'm really exhausted with what I'm doing everyday now...

Disappointed...

That day dear said he will be back tomorrow, then we can meet. I was so happy and waiting for the second we can meet. It has been a week plus since the last time I met dear. But everything turned to be a dream after he called and said he can't be back tomorrow because there will be a meeting. When will I be able to meet dear? Miss him so much so much...

What can I say?

Already a week didn't see dear. And what I get from dear's mouth is that he might got to work at Perlis. Dear ask my opinion. What can I say? Ask him to choose between his future and I? Ask him to choose between his parents and I? His parents have brought him up, while I just a girl that he knows for 4 years. If he choose me and not his parents, I wouldn't want guy like this too. But of course dear not people like this. So, what more can I say? Do I have any choice other than support him?  

First day...

I never know that love can be so scary. Because of love, someone can change the physical appearance. Because of love, someone try to be patience. Because of love, mind can't stop thinking of him. Don't dare to let myself have free time. When I'm free, mind will full with him. Can't stop thinking of him. Very miss dear...